got the best graduation present ever.

Well, if you're into sleeping, that is. And I am. I love sleeping. I sleep entirely too much and on this ship of dreams, I'll be drifting in and out of sleep for hours and hours. I picked out a bed months ago, but I changed my mind a couple times. I went back and forth from this bedto this bed

and finally settled on the second. I think I'm pretty happy with my choice.

is going home.

This will be my last post from Utah for quite a while. Tomorrow morning, at about 6:00 am (if I can make myself get up that early) I will be driving the 13 hours home to Oregon. My car is packed, my room is empty, but I am not sad. I feel like it's time for me to move on. I have an open road in front of me, literally and figuratively. True, I have a plan for the next year or so, but I know that I can't necessarily control the details and so I look forward to this time without the pressures of school as a period of learning and growing. I also feel like I need to be with my family right now. I know I need to save a little money too. I am really grateful for this opportunity to be with them. I actually didn't think that I would be living with them an extended period of time ever again. So I say goodbye to my friends and this city, which has become a second home to me. Goodbye Provo, I'll be back soon, I hope.

reviews books.

It's about time for a book review, folks. Here they are, in no particular order, and they may or may not be recent.

The Host
by Stephenie Meyer


As a Stephenie Meyer addict, I set out to read this book the week it came out. It didn't blow me away, but I was enthralled, nonetheless. It is a science-fiction-y romance that does bring up some interesting issues such as: is it possible to have peace without taking away agency?, what is the line between helping and hurting?, is love really blind?, and other themes related to forgiveness and the sanctity of life. Meyer does tackle a big subject here with the introduction of alien "hosts" into human bodies. The plot of this story comes about when one human won't let go of her consciousness when her alien host takes over. She becomes a back-seat driver in her own body and the two of them work through some complicated issues together. The result is harmonious, not to anyone's surprise. Meyer is yet incapable of writing against her audience's desires, so Twilight fans, brace yourself, or not, because the end is going to be exactly what you want I'm sure. She definitely writes to please, so if you are in a need of a good, not mind-numblingly-sweet romance, the Host is worth the read.

Squashed
by Joan Bauer



I love a good YA-fiction story. Squashed is exactly what I wanted last week in the midst of school and work and I'm so glad I picked it up. It's a simple story: a teenage girl feels unattractive and unwanted even though she is really a very cool girl under the surface. She is a dedicated grower of oversized pumpkins and channels her efforts into winning the annual contest in her town with her giant pumpkin named Max. She babies and coddles him while failing at school and meanwhile trying to catch the eye of a new boy who has a lot in common with her (he grows corn). The ending is sweet and satisfying and not annoying, but the bad guy does get his just deserts, as usual. I enjoy Bauer's crisp writing and her solid character descriptions. I identified a lot with her main character, Ellie, and I am a pumpkin-lover as well, so I guess I was sold from the get-go.

Everyday Sacred
by Sue Bender



This is a lovely book to read sitting cross-legged on the grass, which is exactly how I started reading it. I enjoy the genre-it's an enlightened kind of self-help book that doesn't come across too preachy, but still asks you to make positive changes in your life. Bender is a refreshing writer, but can be a little self-deprecating at times. I enjoy her metaphors and I find myself recalling them even after I am done reading the book. I felt that it was "spiritual" in the sense that I felt like it helped me understand some good things about life that I was able to connect to my own beliefs. It's a very universal look at simplifying certain aspects of life, seeing possibilities, and being satisfied with what we have been given.

The Golden Compass
by Philip Pullman



I have a thing about reading books before I see the movie, so I read the Golden Compass before I watched the movie and I'm glad I did. I know it's been around forever and there are plenty of people saying it's anti-god, and while it is true, Pullman's an atheist, to me that didn't seem like the focus of the novel anyway. Maybe I need to read the next two books to become more aware, but regardless, I enjoyed it. I thought that Pullman should have had a better editor, though. He used a lot of metaphors that didn't make sense and his word choice was off in places. Sometimes the dialogue felt a little ragged. The plot was interesting enough, but I just didn't feel that satisfied with the ending. It kind of fizzled out. In short, I liked it, but I didn't love it.

Red Bird
by Mary Oliver


This is a delicious book of poetry by one of my old favorites. I am so glad that she keeps coming out with books. This one is her largest collection of poems to date, over sixty in one volume! I read through them voraciously, pausing at moments to wipe a tear away or chuckle a little to myself. Her current perspective, after the fairly recent loss of her partner, is focused quite a bit on the cycle of life, of love and death, and the time we spend waiting for things. Her love poems softened a bit after the last ones she wrote for Thirst, which were very grief-stricken. I also love her poems about Percy, who seems to me to be a lot like my late-dog Britty. Her perspective on life through Percy's eyes is very invigorating and makes me want to run down the beach with a stick in my mouth. Okay, maybe not. But I love this book. Don't wait for it to come out in paperback, get it now!

doesn't skinny dip.

I wrote this paper for my swimming class because frankly, I don't care that much about how to swim the the breast stroke correctly. I hope my teacher thinks it's funny because I had a fun time writing it and I think you'll all enjoy it. Especially those who actually do enjoy skinny dipping. You know who you are. ;)

The "Skinny" on Swimming and Modesty

At BYU the pool is a place of extreme modesty. We are required to wear suits that cover our entire body, but in less conservative waters this is not always the case. In most competitive situations, swimmers wear the obligatory full or partial body suit, but often, in recreational atmospheres, swimmers go completely without clothing, a pastime called “skinny dipping.”

I, personally, am not a skinny dipper. I have never spent an extended time naked in the water except for a long, hot bath. I am extremely modest. However, I am intrigued by the fact that many people do enjoy skinny dipping. It is a popular pastime for young, Tom Sawyer-like boys and rebellious teenage girls. It is featured in many popular films including: The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, Oklahoma!, Jaws, The Blue Lagoon, On Golden Pond, Return to Blue Lagoon, Dante’s Peak, and the latest version of The Parent Trap. What is the appeal for it? Perhaps it is the sense of excitement caused by the danger of someone seeing you naked; perhaps it is a desire to re-connect with nature. Either way, skinny dipping remains a popular pastime in the water.

Skinny dipping has been around for centuries. In years past, swimming suits didn’t even exist. When they came into popularity, they were made out of material not conducive to swimming such as wool, which became heavy and itchy when wet, so most people opted to go without. It was even common in public pools, where both genders freely swam without clothing until it became less socially acceptable in the 1960s with the advent of supposed “equal rights.” Nowadays it would violate laws of public “decency” to swim naked in a public pool, but it is allowed on many specially sanctioned beaches across the US; European beaches in general are accepting of nudity.

In closing, skinny dipping is not a harmful activity, but it can be embarrassing to those who have never done it before. If you would like to try skinny dipping, here are some tips: only invite friends you don’t mind seeing naked, be accepting of your own body, go skinny dipping in cloudy water, go in dim lighting or in the moonlight, make sure the water isn’t too cold, don’t push anyone to go—you don’t want to lose a friend, and above all, just take your clothes off and jump in!

Works Cited

“How to convince people to go skinny dipping.” Wikihow—The How-to Manual That
You Can Edit Accessed 13 Jun., 2008.

http://www.wikihow.com/Convince-People-to-Go-Skinny-Dipping


“Skinny Dipping.” Wikipedia Accessed 13 Jun., 2008.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skinny_dipping

met a chicken.

Today, on one of my nightly walks, I met Leland's chicken.


Hello Ma'am. What are you doing out here? She gave me an annoyed look and began walking away, pecking at the ground as she went.


Oh, I'd stay away from there. I tried to warn her about cars, but she wouldn't listen.


She made her way across the lawn, clucking in disapproval at me and my camera.


I wish I could say we became friends, but it wasn't meant to be.

upgraded.

I said goodbye to my old Nokia 3220 today


and said hello to this cute little Motorola W490 in Bubble Gum pink.
My Nokia stood by me for two years, traveling to Russia and back, surviving my unlimited texting plan, and waking me up every morning. I will miss it.

wants to fly.

Have You Ever Tried to Enter the Long Black Branches

Have you ever tried to enter the long black branches
of other lives -
tried to imagine what the crisp fringes, full of honey,
hanging
from the branches of the young locust trees, in early morning,
feel like?

Do you think this world was only an entertainment for you?

Never to enter the sea and notice how the water divides
with perfect courtesy, to let you in!
Never to lie down on the grass, as though you were the grass!
Never to leap to the air as you open your wings over
the dark acorn of your heart!

No wonder we hear, in your mournful voice, the complaint
that something is missing from your life!

Who can open the door who does not reach for the latch?
Who can travel the miles who does not put one foot
in front of the other, all attentive to what presents itself
continually?
Who will behold the inner chamber who has not observed
with admiration, even with rapture, the outer stone?

Well, there is time left -
fields everywhere invite you into them.

And who will care, who will chide you if you wander away
from wherever you are, to look for your soul?

Quickly, then, get up, put on your coat, leave your desk!

To put one's foot into the door of the grass, which is
the mystery, which is death as well as life, and
not be afraid!

To set one's foot in the door of death, and be overcome
with amazement!

To sit down in front of the weeds, and imagine
god the ten-fingered, sailing out of his house of straw,
nodding this way and that way, to the flowers of the
present hour,
to the song falling out of the mockingbird's pink mouth,
to the tippets of the honeysuckle, that have opened

in the night

To sit down, like a weed among weeds, and rustle in the wind!

Listen, are you breathing just a little, and calling it a life?

While the soul, after all, is only a window,

and the opening of the window no more difficult
than the wakening from a little sleep.

Only last week I went out among the thorns and said
to the wild roses:
deny me not,
but suffer my devotion.
Then, all afternoon, I sat among them. Maybe

I even heard a curl or tow of music, damp and rouge red,
hurrying from their stubby buds, from their delicate watery bodies.

For how long will you continue to listen to those dark shouters,
caution and prudence?
Fall in! Fall in!

A woman standing in the weeds.
A small boat flounders in the deep waves, and what's coming next
is coming with its own heave and grace.

Meanwhile, once in a while, I have chanced, among the quick things,
upon the immutable.
What more could one ask?

And I would touch the faces of the daises,
and I would bow down
to think about it.

That was then, which hasn't ended yet.

Now the sun begins to swing down. Under the peach-light,
I cross the fields and the dunes, I follow the ocean's edge.

I climb, I backtrack.
I float.
I ramble my way home.

Mary Oliver

wants to play.

I like to go on walks around my neighborhood. Today I saw this car parked near my house.

It's a Hearse. Kinda creepy, eh?

But wait! It's for sale!

And it's filled with fun balls!

I wanna play too! Er...maybe.

had a bad dream.

Actually, I've had bad dreams two nights in a row now.

The first night I had a dream that I was coerced into going out with a guy that I'm threatened by and he took me to a hamburger joint. He told me that I could only have an ice cream cone, just one scoop, mind you, and when I asked if I could have a hamburger too he denied me! When I finally got out of that place and away from him, I ran into an ex-boyfriend who saved me. Thank you John! And just so you all know, I got myself a hamburger that day.

Last night I had a dream that I was being attacked by three psycho girls (maybe Charlie's Angels?). I knew what I had to do. I grabbed my biggest knife (from Ikea) and I started hacking at their necks! I knew that I had to cut their juglars to take them down. I ended up killing two of them and then I woke myself up because I realized, I don't kill people. I am against it, morally.