When I got back from Hawaii in August and started paying attention to the dismal state of my finances, I started to panic. I realized how deeply in debt I was, and I knew I had to change something. I thought I was beyond this. At the beginning of this year I'd had my finances worked out and I was in a position where I could spend a little. But after moving and setting up an apartment, being out of a job for almost three months, and then moving back home after six months, I lost most of the savings I'd built up over the past year. So in September I went on a shopping fast and started looking for a job, pronto. Since that time, I haven't bought anything superfluous. That's almost three months now. I thought it might be difficult to avoid shopping for even a week, but it hasn't been that bad. Now I ascribe to the old saying "What you don't know can't hurt you" when it comes to spending. If I don't walk into the store, I can't buy anything in it. If I don't take a peek at the sale, I won't even know what it was about or how many dollars I could have "saved." It's refreshing, actually. But don't misunderstand me. I love shopping. I feel at home in Nordstrom and I even went to the mall today. I don't think that I need to ignore the world of shopping or fashion, but I need to be smart about what I buy and for what reason. I realized that earlier this year I was often using shopping as an escape. It provided an instant boost to my mood and self esteem and it's fun to have new things. I don't think this is negative... when I have the resources to do it. The problem is, it's hard to tell myself this when I am in a shopping mood, which can hit me at almost any time and for a variety of reasons. That is why the shopping fast was necessary.
A shopping fast is not like a food fast. It doesn't mean no shopping ever and no going into a store, although some people might need to begin this way and wean themselves into a more healthy state of mind. For me, these are the rules:
1. Make a monthly list of expenses and budget how much I can actually spend on clothes or other "wants"
2. Only spend that amount of money (if there is any left over after expenses, which there really isn't for me right now)
3. Only use credit cards when I can pay them back immediately
4. Don't go into stores unless I need something, or if I do go in a store and I don't plan on shopping, leave my wallet at home
That's it!
It's worked out well for me these past three months and now that I am getting to a place where I am more financially secure, now that I have a new job, I have lost much of my desire to spend for no good reason. I have been more creative with the clothes I have and wearing more of them. I don't have a desire to go to the mall every weekend. I spend more time outdoors going on walks and going hiking. My shopping fast has had more of an effect on me that I imagined. I plan to continue with this fast for as long as I need to, but I don't know if I'll ever be able to go back to the way I was.
On a related note, I went to Walmart (yes, shocking) on Black Friday Eve just to check out the scene. It took approximately ten minutes to walk in the store, weave through all the shoppers, carts, and shelves, and walk right out. I didn't see anything I needed. It felt almost gross to see how much excess there was and how many people believed they needed it. It made me sad to see that Thanksgiving, a holiday specifically for showing gratitude, had unconsciously become about greed for many people. Stores used to be closed on Thanksgiving; now they are opening earlier and earlier to let in shoppers who should be at home with their families instead of trying to buy a cheap laptop, GPS, pair of pajamas, or electric toothbrush. I am trying not to judge, but I can't imagine that the cost of the whole endeavor outweighs the benefit of getting a good deal.
3 comments:
We've been doing a similar thing, out of necessity, while Brandon's been out of work. If you don't go to the store you won't buy it, definitely, and honestly waiting to make purchases even when you have the funding reduces your spending because your mind immediately moves on to the next purchase you want/need to make.
I've been thinking how weird it is that even during all the economic troubles people are going through with unemployment the demand for products still supports the retail industry. I know people have gone out of business, but honestly, if everyone were shopping like I'm (not) shopping, it doesn't seem like stores would stock up like normal and yet they seem to be. How on earth can we all be consuming so many goods? It's astonishing. I also find it astonishing that we feel like we "need" so many luxury items. They're nice, certainly, but you can get by with astonishingly little and still be happy about it.
AMEN! I NEVER want to go shopping on Black Friday. I would definitely prefer to be home with my family.
-Carmen
One thing that helps me is to go to the bank the day I get paid. I cash out the amount of money I want to spend on groceries for the month, for fuel, for "fun," and that's what I spend. Leave the debit card home when you go shopping. When I actually have to hand over CASH, I tend to spend less money on junk.
Good luck! It's worth the sacrifices to get out of debt.
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